MobileChelonian

No, I'm not ghosting for a porn trasncription website....although that's got to be a great job. Those are some actual no shit (!) lyrics from one of my favorite bands...Eisley. And what better way, really, to demonstrate one's fanship than to grossly misappropriate the names and intellectual property of said band? For the slow, that means this is a parody. I had this idea for Little Man involving Christian indie-rockers. I think Alan is going to to make it more Murfreesboro specific, since that's where his readership is...but I had so much fun writing this I thought I'd share it with y'all. Names have been left intact to indict the guity.


Dateline: Tyler, TX


Remember when your pastor told you that listening to records like "War Pigs" from metal groups like "Black Sabbath" would corrupt your soul? Remember when the preacher on TV told you, specifically, not to listen to those LP's backwards, because there were Satanic messages encoded in the lyrics? Well, some of you listened. And now, for you, the credulous and the easily led, there is a new movement in music. Christ's messages of love, cleverly hidden inside popular music.

There's a popular subset of music today known as "indie-rock". It encompasses a vast strata of American culture, and one increasingly well defined niche is Christian indie-rock. But labels and musicians know that being openly Christian is a sure ticket to being called "the next Stryper". Remember them? Thought so. But yet, boys and girls of faith are making the rock and roll their parents condemned! How can they stay true to their faith and still move product? Answer: by hiding those powerful messages inside their songs, where Rolling Stone reviewers can't get to them.


One such band, "Eisley" is no slouch when it comes to the glitz and glamour of modern day "indie-rock". This small family band of Christians from the hill country of Texas professes great familiarity with modern day music. They have seen the Behemoth and they have touched the face of Mammon. Yet in doing so, their own faith became strengthened and they resolved to lead the wayward and stray indie-rockers into God's guiding love.

Their father, and marketing leader "Boyd", had this to say, "We realized about halfway through our first tour that Christians were over-represented in our audience, but under heard. You could spot them in the bars and clubs that we played, the kid sitting towards the back in his Newsboys shirt and a cloth backpack with a NLV Bible inside. They clapped, but they didn't yell. But these kids kept showing up, night after night. We decided, after a family meeting and I don't mind telling you, a lot of coffee, that we had to reach out to them."

And reach out they did: backwards. In the first vinyl LP, "Room Noises", there is not a lyric or chord that suggests anything about Christ. "We had to conform to the Man's demands. You know, The Man" said guitarist Chauntelle Dupree. Her sister Sherri interrupted. "It was like, totally sad. We were told by Warner (their record label) that unless we wanted to be pigeon-holed as a Christian band, we couldn't sing about Jesus. So we hid our messages!" she exclaimed, her bright eyes twinkling with mischief. Chauntelle explained. "A lot our songs don't make much sense," she stated flatly. "That's because you're listening to them frontwards. But played backwards..." She smiles.

I was able to get a transcript of some of the original lyrics for one of the band's most popular songs, as they were originally written. I can't tell you what song it is, that's all copyrighted. But see for yourself:

"Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers,
Deuteronomy make up the holy Pentateuch
But nothing compares to Lord Jesus's wonders
And Satan is a big fat kook"

You'd never think that such a message was hidden, but when I got home and unwrapped the Room Noises vinyl LP that Boyd had thoughtfully given me, I discovered it for myself. I called him immediately afterwards to ask two followup questions. I caught him on his cell phone at a local Starbucks. "What about the CD market", I asked him. "I mean, who listens to vinyl?" He was silent for a moment, and I heard only slow measured sipping. Then he replied, "Indie-rock is all about being different. A lot of people, not just kids, are demonstrating their independence from conventional audio formats by getting into records. They saw their parents old turntables, and Who albums, and want something like that for themselves. And because everything sounds better on vinyl." "What about your band", I asked candidly. "They've toured with a lot of secular humanists, amoral rock bands, and been on stage in I imagine some pretty rough places. Not places where God's love is readily apparent. Can you keep your faith strong and stay Christian and how hard has it been?" He replied as only as a good Christian can. "With prayer, Macintosh recording software, and a lot of caffeine we can do anything."

Posted by Aaron on Monday, January 30, 2006 at 7:49 PM | Permalink